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(looking for) the heartbreaker

It has been more than two months sitting at the little white table in the living room, writing. Pushing out pages, fixing these pages, living with these pages then waking up and chewing them apart again, then adding on a new section. It is a mill, grinding the raw ideas down to a fine powder that may somehow rise and become bread. Or it may not. So many thoughts begin with "what if". What if they get stuck in an old elevator? What if she is not home when they come the first time? What if she is coming back from the market and passes them on the stairs? What if the driver is older? Or younger? What if his brother shows up instead? The questions are greater than the results on the page, the dialogue is whittled down to nubs of something recognizable.

There are cold cups of coffee, emails that go unanswered. The light comes and goes, and most of the work is done in the dark in more ways than one. Cooking dinner helps. Playing some guitar helps. If you are not careful you forge…

Amelia (The Canary)

strangers to the conversation

three things (about marriage, kopeks and guitars)

to be an expat

grace

a familiar betrayal

the letter reader

streetlights

quicksand

fragile

the lost years

this is the day

the white square

(looking for) the heart of Saturday Night

the choice is his (no surrender)

no gold (things will have to wait)

the lion behind the gate

dinosaurs (Don't Know Why)

about Carl

to the moon

there is always something (why I shoot film)

Silver Street

petty crime

that smell (Moscow)

running away with the circus (looking for dolphins)

the black sands of Ureki

ALBINO (PART 2/SECTION TWO - the last excerpt)

Albino (part 2/section one - the Mars Bar)

Albino (part one)

lost & found

every picture

scare me, but don't punish me

the first

with her

every pair of shoes has a story to tell

bad impersonations

Pushkin's wind

Hey, Lyosha

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