30 August 2009

a late birthday in New York

I am back in New York for a few days, speaking clean English, eating real pizza, blowing out birthday candles on a late, delicious cake.

The city smells like laundry soap, and those cornucopia steam tables – of watermelon and sesame chicken. It reeks of cigarettes and stale beer as I travel beneath a midday sun. It is coffee and bacon from Eisenbergs.

Everyone is checking everyone out, sizing each other up like we’re about to fight, or pitch a pathetic one-liner, or get asked out on a date.

I walk up and down the city, catching bits of conversations in French, and German. I hear someone speaking Russian and my ears perk up like a terrier. I turn and follow these strangers down Church Street until I know what they are doing here.

People stop me and ask for directions to the World Trade Center, to the Brooklyn Bridge.

Guys are leaning out of cars, calling to girls in short skirts. Children are running under sprinklers on a playground.

The city smells like a clean shirt.

24 August 2009

from plastic cups

I’ve been drinking with the guards again, from plastic cups. There were tiny blue plums from their summer house, soft and mealy. There were meat pies and cucumbers, arranged carefully on paper plates.

I take a long walk home in the dark, across a river. A warm wind begins to blow.

It’s been an impossible few weeks. Living on the rubles in my pocket, staring at the full moon. A plant is dying in my office. I talk to it every day, as more leaves fall quietly to the windowsill.

Winter is coming already. I can feel the warm wet windows, and the pale grey sidewalk. I can see the first snow coming one night. Just a light dusting. Not enough to sled in, or roll into a snowman.

That will come later, after New Year’s Eve.

17 August 2009

сорок один (forty one)

Raining, then not raining we pulled on jeans and went downstairs to buy bread and butter, to make French toast. E jumped in a puddle, splashing me and scaring the pigeons.

We played for hours, me on guitar, her on her microphone, harmonica, dancing with the kittens. She gave me a piece of paper with 41 pairs of lips on it, each more interesting than the next. We counted them a few times, first in Russian, the in English. Definitely 41.

Outside again, we made our way to рынок (the outside market) and sat in a makeshift Uzbek cafe. She tore into the flat bread they brought us, and we shared lamb shashlik. I drank a dark cup of tea with lemon as the rain came back, splattering the windows. People were singing on the tv in the corner, some kind of European competition. The tables were full of men eating soup, smoking cigarettes, sipping the same fragrant tea. Women in blue smocks wrapped dishes in aluminum foil, as taxi drivers stepped inside, paying and taking their packages, sometimes lifting a corner and smelling their heady lunch.

E fell asleep on my shoulder, and I walked across the river, past Arbat and the vacant casinos, past Lenin’s library, past Teatralnaya square, to the fountains outside the Kremlin. She woke up slowly, seeing the giant horse sculptures, the tourists, feeling the cool spray from the fountains that found their way to her face. She laughed a little. We heard music playing, a perfect Soviet waltz. Here, a military orchestra played under an archway. The wind came up and blew the music from their stands, and they kept playing. Old women danced with old women, both leading, it seemed. An old man in a uniform leaned against his cane, leaning so far forward, maybe to hear the band better I thought.

There were red roses, pink ones, yellow ones. There were beautiful pools of green water, and statues of characters from great fairy tales. One fountain spewed water across a footpath, and we ran underneath it’s deafening sound. E laughing and shouting at me, that we had gone under the ocean.

The West entrance to Red Square was littered with tourists and kite sellers. We stood our time in the group that circled a bronze star set into the cobblestones. People jumped forward, waiting to have their picture taken as they threw rubles over their shoulder. This is the zero point, where all roads begin, from the very center of Moscow. In Russian, “null kilometer”. We found our moment, and jumped together.

“Ras, dva, tri!” E shouted at everyone, and we threw our coins.

It was my only birthday present this year.

Later, we shared some French fries from McDonalds. It seemed oddly appropriate.

10 August 2009

Postcards from late summer

The ground in front of the bargain

wedding chapel is littered with

shiny plastic hearts and stars

and small coins. We

squat on the pavement

shoving them into

our pockets.


I bring my guitar home

and we play on the fire escape

you with your tiny, tiny

violin tucked under

your chin.

Me, playing songs from

an empty living room

before you were born

when I used to see

the towers

outside the dirty

glass of my

bachelor windows.


It’s time to buy

a watermelon now

not too big

and it needs to sound

like a drum.


They stopped

building the skyscraper

behind

our place. Maybe it’s

for offices,

maybe for homes.

A crane sits motionless above

the half-built

skeleton, in

a cloudy sky, a wet

night, a windy Sunday. But someone

had the idea to

inflate a great

red balloon inside the

structure

and put lights

inside it

so at night

it beats like a giant

heart, against the dark sky

a giant heart, counting

out the minutes

until the crane

will move, or maybe

until the

snow will come.


The leaves are already turning

yellow.



03 August 2009

jholtei ghorka (the yellow slide)

The yellow slide,
a dirty macaroni
shape
children clawing their
way backwards
and then
swirling down.
She wanted to
every time,
taking the short green
one instead.
Playing in the sand
making star shapes
and little cakes.
Quietly, I brought
her to the
bottom.
We sat, even
lay down and
looked up at the
clouds.
I began pulling her
by the hands
up a few
feet,
then letting her go.
She was terrified
like our kittens
during a
thunderstorm.
And we returned, each
time a few
extra inches
me letting her
go, then
catching her.
“Papa, will you catch me?”
She asks, every single
time.

There was a great
red rooster
when I was
a boy.
I wore jeans each
summer to avoid
getting pecked
during his daily
attacks.
I banged pots
and pans together
got the dogs
after him
but he kept
coming
until he died
and we made a
great soup from him
which I savored
for hours
sitting at the dinner table
long after everyone
had gone to watch
tv.