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running away with the circus (looking for dolphins)

There are three of them, a brazen woman with bright eyes and a big voice, a man going grey with a hop in his step and a younger woman who might be their daughter or their niece that twists her short hair into little tufts. They roam the hotel, sometimes in elaborate costumes, letting us know that there will be a secret dance party near the ballroom in an hour.

The older woman strolls in during dinner in a costume of blinking Christmas lights and exotic face paint. V stares up at her, convinced she is a princess or a fairy or maybe both. The next night, she is all in black, great horns wobbling on her head. She always has a pair of black Converse high tops on, as if they go with every costume or maybe they are the only shoes she owns.

The man is typically dressed as a pirate, in a striped shirt, maybe an eye patch. He is perfectly relaxed, like his limbs are made of silly straws. The younger woman is always smiling, her mouth a wall of metal braces and lip gloss. I imagine they sleep …

the taste of coins

The best part of the day comes at 5:30, when I pick up E from detskie sad. I often see her before she sees me. Her fluffy green jacket is still a little big. She stands with giant eyes, chattering with the other children. I see them dancing in a circle, holding hands. I see them running and hiding behind bushes, and under the apple tree.

I had just seen the blind girl from poje (later) in the street.

She was walking better, but still not very well. I thought to call out to her, but felt this was intrusive. Somehow I thought she would need to recognize me - not the other way around - for this sort of run-in to work.

Her eyes wide open, her face turned towards the sky and the light rain that fell on both of us.

Later, E came back to the office with me, where she would decorate the room with corn flakes, dolls and clay.

Passing under Smolenskaya, some stray dogs gnawed on blood red bones. Some guys sat around them, drinking cheap beer and smoking. I felt an algae taste in my mouth, like the back of my throat was covered with pennies. I could feel a cold coming on, and surrendered to it.

The snow was coming, and it would be easier once it arrived. A sort of relief, for the long slow winter to start.

Comments

brenda said…
Wait a minute. How could the girl recognize you, if she's blind? But oh how I love "the taste of algae" and the cold coming on. Cold, in every sense of the word.
ccn said…
Lovely blog. I walk around here feeling full to bursting often too... and I have an E who is almost four. We should get them together some time. We live near Patriarshy.
Rabbit blogger said…
ccn! sending you an email.
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